The pinnacle of “redneck” was thought to have been established some years ago when a flock of imbibing cowboys, while sitting around telling lies, spotted a skunk waddling across the yard.
“This rotten skunk was threatening the household of women,” the shooter explained. “And I, as a duty-bound agent of the law, was dispatched to the scene. I found the culprit who I believed to be cocked and locked, so in return I took a defensive position, fired and saw a dangerous threat fall. However, the bullet did also penetrate the home of the women folk.” (caveat – “agent of the law” is actually “insurance agent”)
Meanwhile back at Cedar Hills, a recent occurrence has likely raised the bar for “redneck” antics. The head cowboy was awakened at dawn by the sound of gunfire. Not a foreign noise to him but a little uncommon in the world of today.
He jumped from his bed, threw on his pants and boots and in the same motion, grabbed his pistol and headed to the front door. There he found his son-in-law Brett and his guest, an old friend named Boone, “shooting up the place.”
Boone had arrived from out of state a couple days earlier for a visit. In a longstanding game of ornery tricks between Boone and the cowboy, it was decided that it would be most humorous to have Boone stay in the guest room instead of some of the other cabin options available.
The “funny” was because outside this guest room is a big pine tree that two of the resident roosters called home. Their job, as they saw it, was to wake the entire place up at 4-5 a.m. with the sounds one would expect from a rooster. In duo, it was deafening.
The first morning, those in on the plan waited expectantly for the fallout, but Boone said nothing. The second morning was a different story.
Brett was about to get in the shower and with a glance out the window, he sees Boone coming out the door wearing his boots, hat, bathrobe and a pistol in his hand. Brett, thinking there is trouble, throws on a towel, slips into his shoes and grabs his shotgun.
Boone greets Brett with a simple statement. “Those damn roosters have woke me up for the last time.”
The guest room at Cedar Hills is now very quiet in the mornings.
|Julie can be reached for comment at email@example.com|